Friday, March 4, 2011

Do you think kids cause Divorce?

I was married for 9 yrs with 3 kids from that marriage, the relationship helped me to grow and see  what  I wanted out of my life although there were problems long before the kids came along. I saw the signs.. and thought he would change things would get better, sadly people don't change because you want them to, no matter how hard you try. I think we see the good parts and hope we can mold or change someone to be who we want, again this doesn't happen.Then kids come along, the first one things seem better and about 6 months after it's back to the same way it was before the sleepless nights, stress that only adds to the stress the relationship was already suffering from. You still hope for change that never comes. A second child ! ooh yes.. but no, the first one didn't make things better why would the second ? The stress compiles. Resentment builds until one day you feel like your alone and all you have are the kids. Unappreciated.. needing help, and he's not there. So you ask do kids cause divorce?, they are the innocent by standers in a relationship that wasn't good from the start. For me  they were the reason to finally wake up and see that I deserved better that they deserved a better mom, They were not the cause, but the strength I needed to say I had enough it was time to end it. I don't regret being married, it was that relationship that gave me my kids. I just came to the realization that I was never truly happy from the start. Tell me what you think !